Exhibitions

I heard a lot of people didn't pass, I really wanted to cry for them, since they aren't crying. People try to act strong but once in a while we all need a shoulder to lean on. I walked in today looking and wondering why there were so many people sitting on the floor, I didn't walk through them so I went downstairs and went up the other way. For me I would think it's rude for me to walk through so many people so I would rather walk around. I waited outside for my exhibition to start but couldn't help listening to what the other students were talking about. I also wanted to know how they were doing, hoping they all pass so they could get on with things. At 2o'clock the hallway was asked to be cleared out, so I waited I really want everyone to pass but that's the grader. Do they want us to face the hard truth? Are we ready for the hard truth that it's not good enough and that we have to work harder because that's just the way of life. After I presented I waited outside the next thing I heard made me really want to fail, I guess I had that feeling in the beginning after listening to everyone talk, the words they had to say. Do they really think I'm even happy being Asian, do they think I don't understand how they feel. Last year I past by 1.5 points I think and someone failed by the same amount I said if only I could give those points to that person even if the happiness for a little while. But we all have to face that sad truth.

In that hard way, it looked like everyone was gonna cry but holding it in, being strong making sure it doesn't rain inside and worrying those around them. They are all kind people, I can't help but step away from them because they make me want to cry so badly. Those kind hearts, I don't want to see them being crushed, even though the words they said we kind of mean, they don't really mean it, they just couldn't help it because I understand. They said if many of the them were to fail maybe they could fix it during vacation and ask the principal if we could just have a second chance to make thing right. They said they wouldn't mind coming in because they were helping each other. I was thinking I want to help too if they didn't mind. They said it's not fair if everyone that's walking won't be able to walk with their friend, I agree with this, they said probably all of the Asian would pass and other a hand full of them will get to walk. Asian don't have to worry about anything but that's not true because I just like one of them, I understand how it feels like to fail, to watch everyone just walk away because you can't catch up but not here, not at SOF, I'm watching everyone work together as a team, backing each other up, it gives off a sad and happy feeling, I just want to help so badly. Please don't think of me as just a normal Asian because I'm not I can understand how it feels to fail and succeed. Every time you think I don't understand it hurts because it's as if you reject me from your world, even if it's for a moment. Just because I'm Asian it doesn't mean I'm smart, I'm not smart at all, it's just the people I'm with. All I try to do is always have fun, pretending as if everything is always okay. The only thing I wanted from it was hoping that everyone would be happy, not matter how hard thing are, I can take it as long as you're happy then I'm fine with it.

Even if we fail this time, we'll always have another chance to fix it, work together to make things better. If your work isn't good enough, changing it even a little bit and understand what you want others to hear from you can make a change. Like a plant, you plant it together and slowly it will grow, it will come to grow out of your happiness making big changes in your life. Another thing is, so what if you fail, failing isn't a life and death thing so you'll have another chance. In life you'll have to face something more harsh and dangerous then this so to cry over a little thing like this, when you think back to this time, you'll laugh about it thinking this is something so little. Failing is just another lesson and one step closer to achieving something like those movies we watched in Andy's class where the teacher fails to win the students attention and so they try again and what do they get? Think about it.

Sorry for my harsh words ._.